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Translated by Manah Siksa devi dasi 
To read this article in Spanish, click HERE
By B.A. Paramadvaiti Swami http://www.vrindavan.org
Vrindavan, December 22, 2002
My dear spiritual daughters,
Please accept my blessings.
To all my daughters and to the women who aspire to be devotees, I write these lines from my heart.
The ignorance to not appreciate the contribution, participation and service from the others in spiritual life, is born from the omnipresence of maya and from not having the exclusive decision to serve the spiritual master and them who are very acquainted to him and very advanced in surrendering and to represent the spiritual master.
Sometimes there are devotees who involve in anything and try to make excuses or pretexts and even go so far to blame the spiritual master for his/her mayas and difficulties, when in reality the spiritual master is the only one who can save us from all our problems. Then, when in accordance to the association we have, or from what we read, if not the spiritual master and his associates are in the first place, then we will have a tendency to become confused with our own material desires.
The principle is, and this is applicable to all disciples, but even more to the female single disciples: that your spiritual master is your chief, your swami, the total sum of your protection and orientation. For him we work carefully and we have to be his representatives in everything we do. If one is conscious about this, one will sense this higher taste, whether 18 or 88 years old.
For the married devotees, if the husband is not the representative of the spiritual master or does not represent this consciousness, it will be very difficult to surrender to him with all the joy of matrimonial surrender. Therefore many marriages do not work, because initially they have an attraction, but there is a lack of determination for this union to be very sacred, and, if the spiritual appreciation is missing in a marriage, then very soon respect will also be missing.
Many devotees are leaders, because Krishna Himself interfered with their lives through the personality of the spiritual master and of his message and his service. Prahlad Maharaj said: "Then, how could I abandon him?" Sometimes when the devotees become negligent in this respect, they do not observe the severity in their diversion and it ends in total confusion
My dear daughter, take this example: In a battle everybody depends on the decisions from the general. If different subordinates take contradictory decisions, then the very purpose of the battle could be destroyed for the lack of coordination. Suddenly they bomb their own people. Therefore the size of the battalion does not matter, everyone responds to and reports to his commandant directly or submissively to his representative, but the general is perfectly conscious of the participation, the battlefield and the responsibility to the very last soldier when necessary, inclusive the last spy in action.
Likewise, my family is very big, and sometimes some devotees can feel that it is not so important what they do and that I do not have time for them, or that they do not have report. But this is not correct. In the same way as my fight for my spiritual master is very important, likewise each detail in this mission, each participant, every new devotee, each grandchild who is born, each advancement in the preaching that is made, is equally important for me, just like the entire mission. There is a very ponderous example in Mahabarata in relation to this. The example is:
"To save a family, one has to sacrifice a member of the family. To save a village, one has to sacrifice all the family. To save a country, one has to sacrifice the whole village, and to save oneself, one has to sacrifice the whole world".
But in a spiritual family, to save oneself or to save the mission of the spiritual master, one does not have to sacrifice anybody. One only has to sacrifice some of the sense gratification, of the speculation, of the envy, of the independence, and literally care about the spiritual master. If we do not practice and preach this, then things will start to dissolve, we will become pleasure-seeking and we will end in practicing a superficial religiosity. Rituals, but no surrender. Being served by Krishna instead of serving Krishna.
Everything has been anticipated by Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu, and when He talked about humility, the submission to the guardian is in the first place. That is true humility.
It is only the fights that put a check on the natural development of the Vishnu Priya Ashrams. So, you and all of them who like to really help, can help to establish this nice loving ashram. Please, communicate to all my daughters and women aspirants to being devotees, and let them know my wish to see them go very strong in the spiritual life and stop being hippies in the kingdom of maya.
Even though the majority of people think that sense enjoyment is the most important, they sometimes do not care well for their ideals to obtain gratification, but the price is very high and they obtain neither peace nor happiness. For instance, the sexual life without blessings is a sure misery. It is thousand times better to control oneself and not to have sexual relations, than to get carried away by maya, who is manifested as opportunities or propositions from a person who is not faithful to the spiritual master. This is the essence to overcome the lust. Besides that, the human beings are not really much different from the monkeys, who in a moment of innocence want to copulate the same day with anyone who passes his way. This is always given in such an ordinary and deceitful way, as the majority of people only want the enjoyment, but not the matrimonial obligations in general and to be a father and a mother. I think that they all will lose their human body for not having known to respect the obvious sacred in the procreation and that they do not bother, just for some moments of egoistic pleasure, leaving men, women and children wasted on the way.
Lust controls the world of maya. The holy matrimony protects the human beings from total disaster. The renouncement and the protection from the spiritual master protect them, who want to get out from the material existence, from the world of lies, since this sort of infatuation is nothing more than a deceit of the mind, to beautify our lust. In a true relationship, the good dharma has to be in the centre.
It is very nice how the Vedic marriages worked in the past, but from all of that, there is only one thing that works today and that protects us in our occidental environment, and that is that the potential couple should accomplish excellently with their spiritual master. Well, one who does not accomplish with the spiritual master, will even less accomplish with a partner. And if there is no such excellent candidate who wants to marry one, then one should take it as a benediction to be able to continue to serve the spiritual master without any disturbance at all. The life as a single mother is nothing to strive for. It is not a pleasant situation. But the lust, the deceit, the bad character, the disobedience to the spiritual master and to the principles of Dharma, brings this sad situation to many people. Therefore I continue to cry out the same thing, even though I seem to repeat the theme over and over again; you have already heard many times my explications in this question. For me, single devotees are fortunate, it is a benediction in this Kali yuga to remain single in the service to the spiritual master, this is not a bad karma. It is only a bad karma when one feels it is a bad karma, but even like that, if one feels it is a bad karma, it turns to a good karma if one sizes the opportunity and serves the spiritual master from the heart.
So finally, how much bad karma don’t we have to suffer? And if the bad treats we have done to our ex-couples and our ex-children many times in previous lives, is the reason to why we in this life cannot have children or cannot find any faithful and auspicious partner?
Our state of health, the face that we have, the family we are born into and the government of our country, are also karmas that we cannot easily change. Of course one can try to imagine that the grass is greener on the other side, but the simple truth is that it does not matter where one goes, because one carries one’s karma along, and the success as well as the failure, one can obtain anywhere. For a Vaishnava there is no greater success than that the spiritual master is content with her/his service and that Krishna converts her/him to an instrument for His love.
Thus, the Vishnu Priya Ashrams are centres of refuge and training of maximal importance to make us more humble, better servants to the spiritual master and to be able to serve the loving family of Krishna without lust and envy of the deceitful world. All women belong to the Vishnu Priya Ashram. The mothers, who do not live in the temple, are external members. The grihasta mothers receive in the Vishnu Priya Ashram, strength and a place where their daughters can find refuge and support. This is the most important in the world.
It is my desire that my sons and daughters always find a Vaishnava refuge without arrogance and deceit, without childish fights, where the Ishtadeva and the service to the spiritual master is the permanent central figure for the efforts, since when these are not in the centre of the life, then only our egoistic gratification will invade this sacred space and cause immediate damage.
Whoever that minimizes the importance of my Ishtadeva and my Guru in my conscience and my daily practices, is not my friend. It is just one more poor fool among millions in the world. It is rather my duty if I can, to carry away such persons, to at least understand the importance of taking the refuge to a devotee of Lord Krishna and to the practices of devotion to the Supreme Personality of Godhead.
This is the only reason why I have opened and maintain so many temples, despite the reverse from maya, the econo-miseries or the little collaboration that there is sometimes. Even if there was just one single person, I would be disposed to open a new temple, because I know that for that person it would be a benediction, and everyone who would come to know him or her or them and start to listen to Srimad Bhagavatam and its holy message, and who would start to listen and chant the holy name of Sri Hari, his or her life will never be the same. The new dimension of the spiritual life has already begun to open its doors to them in the same extent as they want to reciprocate the mercy they have received.
I hope this message will keep your batteries charged for long time.
From Vrindavan in the blessings from Srila Prabhupada.
Always your well-wisher,
Swami B.A. Paramadvaiti
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